Here I am. Again. It has been more than a week since I said goodbye to my family and friends, to my town of Gualeguay and Argentina and that was anything but simple. Although everything seems normal again, it doesn’t feel that way to me. Every day that passes reminds me even more of Argentina.
Thursday the 2nd of April I was told by the embassy that they had arranged a flight for me. A flight that would leave on Saturday the fourth of April. Two days, that’s all I had. Although I knew for almost three weeks that I would have to leave, it was still hard. I was secretly hoping that they would tell me that I could stay but I also knew deep inside that this was impossible. Sooner or later the farewell would come and I couldn’t avoid it. I did my best to enjoy my last days as much as possible but that wasn’t easy. Certainly not with the whole coronavirus situation. In spite of that I was able to say goodbye to some friends and I was very happy about that. I may not have been able to say goodbye to everyone as I would have liked but I was able to say goodbye to my best friends. That was the only thing that really mattered to me. It allowed me to leave home with a little peace of mind.
Saturday morning, the day I left. Honestly, it was weird. I could hardly believe I had to leave then. With everything I have thought of this is the last time I… It is the last time I sleep here, it is the last time I have breakfast here, it is the last time I shower here. At ten o’clock there was a taxi outside with which I was going to Buenos Aires. It was time to say goodbye. In summary it was just very difficult and sad. Saying goodbye to this family that I can now proudly call my family was heartbreaking. That bond we’ve built up in these seven months wasn’t just a bond. I just feel that. It was special and always will be. I’ve felt so happy in those seven months, I’ve felt so loved and I’ve had an incredible laugh. I’ve been incredibly lucky to think that fate had brought us together. I’m really sure of that and of course I’m incredibly grateful for that. I can still remember myself doubting my choice of country. I had to choose a program and give up at least three countries. I really only wanted Argentina and Bolivia but those were two different programs and because I could not choose I chose the program of Argentina and that of two other countries. If the organization wouldn’t choose Argentina for me I would just change programs. Because I could. Then it would be university in Bolivia. So it’s fate that decided and made it clear to me where I had to be. Preferably I would have stayed there but I also know that this was impossible. Although this chapter of my life turns out to be closed I know deep inside that this is not really the case. Even though my exchange is over I just know that I will return. For a trip or maybe I decide to study or live there. Who will know? In the end, it will tell itself.
In the end it was Sunday night when I finally came home. It was a long journey. Way too long. It started with a three hour drive to Buenos Aires with several checks, several hours at the airport, a twelve hour flight to Germany because there was no flight to Belgium, then another hour in the train to Köln where finally my parents were waiting for me and then finally to drive home which was another three hours drive. All in all it is of course quite a lot and that was clearly noticeable afterwards. Until today I still feel something hanging in my body. The tiredness is certainly not completely gone yet, but that is the least of my worries. During this lockdown I will have enough time to catch up on my rest. Now we are just over a week away and I have to admit that the first week passed surprisingly quickly but I could feel an emptiness from day one that I still feel for the time being. It’s as if the more days go by the harder it gets and I’m starting to realize that I really do miss it. That feeling won’t go away right away, I know that too. Maybe I will continue to feel that because it has been a very important period/experience for me. Anyway I will have to fully adapt to life here again and for that I will have to be patient for a while. All in all, I’m fine. Of course I would like to meet up with friends, just like you guys, now with what I have behind me I could really use it but unfortunately we will have to wait a while for that.
So there is really nothing more to say. As you’ve read I’m home, my exchange is done and despite I don’t have any Argentinian news anymore I’m still in doubt if this will be the last post. For the time being I still have some ideas that I might just want to work out. Anyway, you will see. Hope everything goes well with everyone!
Big kiss x
Aventuras en Argentina 